I'm just needing to vent right now. I've been a little discouraged because of comments people make about us having another baby on the way. Children are a blessing from God right? He tells us that. So why do people get so crazy? I admit that after I found out, I had a long crying spell because I was scared, and not for reasons most people like to dwell on. I was crying because I was so worried about my health. As most of you know my health goes down hill at the end and I was told after I had Aiden that they're problems I'll always have when I get pregnant. Now that I've learned more about these health problems I get, it's really scary! Then I sucked it up and got over and got excited.

Now people just ask how we feel about it and act liks it's crazy that Aiden and the new baby will be approx. 18 months apart. It's hurtful. I don't know why anybody thinks they have the right to make bold comments about your life and put in their 2cents. The people who truly love us are excited for us and I guess that's all that matters.

I was talking to my mom about what my Dr told me about why the pill doesn't work sometimes. He basically said that any little thing in the world can throw it off. So, I was talking about how I was sick for like 4 weeks. Not seriously ill, just a cold I couldn't shake. My mom told me to get that out of my head and to not even think about it because God had other plans for us and this baby is meant to be. I cut our Pastor's hair yesterday and I was telling him what a surprise this baby was, and he was talking to me about how God has wonderful plans for us and it's all about His timing. It was such an encouragement!

So, thank you to those of you who have been encouraging and positive and supportive...it really means a lot right now.

Blessings...

I must admit that life has been a little rough lately. I haven't posted because who wants to sit and read something negative? I've really had to to sit and do a lot of praying, so God could remind me of all that he's blessed me with in this life.

First I have Jeff :) I'm so thankful for how hard he works to take care of us. It's an even bigger help that he picks up extra hours so I can focus on school and our family. I really don't know how I would do it if I had to work at the same time. I can say that I probably wouldn't be passing because at this phase of our higher up classes there's a lot of work involved even when we're not at school. Anyway, he really is my best friend and I don't know what I would do without him.

Then there's my little Aiden. All I have to see is his big, bright smile with those little teeth and everything is right with the world. Or, he'll have days like today when he gives me tons of kisses all on his own, and it melts my heart! That kid really keeps me going, and he's my inspiration to be a better person. I feel as if I do a lot of what I do is because of him and wanting him to have a good life.

Baby D. that's on the way...I think the shock has worn off, and I'm so excited. There's no greater blessing in life than to get to experience being pregnant and feeling that baby in your belly. Then when you see your baby for the first time...It's an experience you never forget. Even though you're tired and crying and feeling like it's a very surreal experience, it's a moment that's always so vivid and clear in your mind. I get to do that again in about 6 months! Wow!

Then there are our parents. I don't know what we'd do without good parents. My parents, especially my dad have been great with watching Aiden when I'm in school. That takes such a load off my mind because I know he's in the best hands. I don't have to worry about anything at all. If I didn't have them to help then I seriously wouldn't even be in school right now because it's so hard to trust people with your kids these days. Jeff's parents are always so encouraging and loving. His mom writes us letters a couple times a week, and it's always a higlight of my week. They're always filled with such love for us. We're always reminded that we're prayed for. I'm blessed with a great family!

It's just good every now and then to sit and remind yourself of how many blessings you really do have because it is so easy to get discouraged. I just try to focus on these things and think of how much easier everything will be in 6 months when I'm done with school.

Have a great weekend everyone. I send my love to you all!

Off to a great start!

Today I saw my doctor for my first big visit, and everything is going very well. I've been crying and scared because I know I'm predisposed to some health problems, as most of you know. They ran a glycohemoglobin which basically checks your sugar levels to see what they've been for the past 3 months. My levels were fine, which was a huge relief. I had a good blood pressure reading as well, so I was very pleased!! I didn't get to hear the heartbeat today because I'm still to early for the doppler to pick it up through my belly, so we'll get to hear it again in 4 weeks. The doctor said everything looks healthy and all of my blood work is excellent. I couldn't ask for much more right now.

I need to head on out and finish up some paperwork for my clinical tomorrow while Aiden is still napping. I just wanted to give a quick update.

Coming Jan 1st, 2008!

Surprised? We sure were! I went to the ER May 10th around 2am because I was having some pains. They were horrible or sharp. It was more of an ache, and I thought that I needed to go in and make sure it wasn't something more serious going on. The Dr came in around 4am and he said that he thought we were going to be really surprised and then he proceeded to tell us that I'm pregnant. What a surprise! I really was not expecting to hear that. But he said that's all they found and nothing else was wrong. It was much better news than I was expecting to hear!!

Wednesday we had the ultrasound, and I told the tech that the ER Dr said I was about 3 weeks. She then told us that we wouldn't be able to see the baby because it was so early. She was just going to take a look and make sure everything looked healthy. So, she started everything up, and there was the baby! We heard its heartbeat and it was beautiful. She said that I was definitely farther along than we all thought, so she measured the baby and its due date is Jan 1st!

I think this has been the biggest surprise I've ever had, but it's also been the biggest blessing too :) We get to be parents again and Aiden gets to be a big brother. I'm so very thankful!

Calling all first time moms!

The mother-daughter banquet at our church is coming up on May 12th. Yesterday after our Sunday morning service our pastor's wife came up to me and she asked if I would give a testimony. She's getting different moms at different stages and grandmothers to talk about what it means to them to be a mom. I will be speaking as a first time mom. Any tips? I just want to truly capture what it's like being a first time mom. I'm very nervous because I cry sometimes just thinking about how much I love Aiden, so I know there will be some tears when I have to get up and talk about it. Seriously, any advice would be greatly appreciated!

More of Aiden on the move!

Aiden

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I'm sitting here sick. There must be something going around this state of Ohio! I thought it was bronchitis at first, and now I think it's a bad head and chest cold. I'm praying so hard that Aiden doesn't catch it because he's never been sick!

I can't get enough of this boy. His second tooth is coming through! It's so cute to see him smile with his little tooth. He now knows how to give kisses. He's discovering his voice, and his new thing is screaming. The first few times he screamed I would run to his rescue, only to discover that he was just playing and excited. He wasn't hurt like I thought he was. On Wed he goes to the Dr for his 9 month check-up, and I can't wait to get his stats because I think he's pretty tall and he's very solid. He has to be over 20 pounds now. I am impressed too b/c when he started rolling to where he wanted to go we started tapping his little hand and telling him no when he was getting into things he shouldn't be into. Now we'll tell him now and he stops whatever he's doing and finds his toys. I'm so pleased because a kid who is allowed to touch everything drives me crazy! What drives me even more crazy is when these people come to your house and act like your crazy for having pretty things out, and then because they can't make their child listen they start moving your stuff up high and out of the way. Ummmm, no! Having nice things out isn't the problem if you know what I'm saying. Enough said.

I have another class down at school and I start a new one on Monday. It's going to be Muskuloskeletal. I hear it's not too hard, so I hope the reports I'm hearing are accurate. I had a rough clinical on Tues. I can't say too much, but I sat and watched my lady die all day. She didn't die while I was there, but you knew she wasn't going to make it. It broke my heart. I know it would be worse for her to suffer though. I did my best to keep her as comfortable as I could. Thursday will be my next clinical day, and hopefully it's a much better day!

I need to head on out and take some more meds and put my pitiful self in bed. Have a great weekend everyone!